What’s up with the ugly sweaters now? Doesn’t the whole thing lose its shtick when they deliberately make ugly sweaters?
Back in the day, we legit dug way back in our closets for that monstrosity that was a gift from our well-meaning aunts when we were 17. It smelled like mothballs. Tragic amazingness! Or maybe our moms had the one “great sweater” that we wanted to “please borrow for a party” to her gleeful delight, all the time us knowing full well that horrendous thing would get a lot of laughs. The one that still smelled like White Rain and cigarette smoke. People were truly agog and rendered speechless when we showed up, right? And they could smell us!
It was the fact that those were REAL sweaters people truly INTENDED to wear…and probably did…that made them so ugly and fantastic. Now…we just go to Wal-Mart and grab the best battery-lighted, primary-colored disaster we can find so our party friends can tell us we look cute. Just no. Ugly sweaters should not be deliberate.
Can we please make it a 2022 goal to bring back real 70’s earth-toned cardigans and 80’s color block sweaters so that, come December, we’re all set for future Christmases? Our aunts need something to buy us, and we can leave them smelling like Biofreeze and hand sanitizer for our own kids. Bring back REAL ugly, smelly sweaters…the kind that makes people stop and gawk in horrified disbelief. That’s the good stuff.