Y’all notice the “support other women” movement happening over the last few years? It’s louder than ever. You can barely scroll any social media outlet twice without seeing posts, verses, and memes about women encouraging women. I don’t know where the sentiment comes from and, seemingly suddenly, why it’s a thing, but I don’t care. I’m here for it…because I want you to be happy. Really.
Life is hard. I think we have all realized that it’s important to admit we struggle, speak up about it, and try to get a handle on the difficulties we face. It’s made us recognize that we’re all too damn tired to try to outdo each other. And we don’t need to try to outdo each other. We’re too busy not only juggling day-to-day stuff but also dealing with mental health stuff, too. And all that is exhausting.
Most of us want our own thing. We don’t covet your thing. The world now gives us SO MANY options and total permission to be ourselves. I really think we have gotten better at imagining the lives we want and working to create them. You got a new Louis Vuitton bag?! Work it, Girl. I just put new bamboo sheets on my bed. I don’t really want a LV bag. I mean…I love them… but it’s not MY priority. But you wanted one? I’m SO glad you got it! It’s beautiful!
Ain’t nobody got time for mess. NOT being happy for you means I’m jealous or bitter or discouraging. I don’t have space for that. I’m working too hard to have joy, find peace, and be grateful to The One who blesses me. Feeling some kind of way about what another chick has or gets to experience can’t coexist with joy, peace, and gratitude. And God don’t like ugly.
I want other women to win. If that means being encouraging, sharing any knowledge or wisdom I have, offering that recipe, saying those kind words…whatever…I want others to have joy and peace, too. There is no room in the world for any more miserable people. If I can help another woman get a leg up, I’m ready. We all deserve happiness, and I want to be surrounded by happy people.
As I write this, I think about how some of those posts, verses, and memes I see posted might be passive aggressive or disingenuous. Everybody doesn’t think like me, although they might pretend to on social media. I can’t worry with that. I can only do what I can do to build other moms up, to motivate other studio owners and dance teachers to be their best, to support women struggling to balance all the things. I have to go to bed at night content with my efforts and proud of my own ability to have narrowly made it through another day. And perhaps most important…I have to safeguard my circle and keep an eye out for passy-aggressy, fakey folks who don’t have my back (and aren’t interested in my having theirs).
How can we lift each other up? What can we do to help other women feel like they are not alone? Can we give of ourselves to inspire others and help them get ahead (even if that means they are ahead of US!). Why can’t we all be good?
I’ll be looking for ways and trying my best. I want you to be happy. Really.
Amanda Herring, Writer 