I’m Bad at purging. I’m good at hoarding.

I decided yesterday I was going to boss up and get a handle on all this laundry. I am also ADHD, so in the midst of that, I decided to purge a little. I also stopped to order more hangers, clean behind the night stand, and put all my tennis shoes away properly, but anyway…

Two drawers. I sifted through two drawers and filled one garbage bag with khaki shorts I won’t wear because I’m too fat, tank tops that are too small (Ms. Boobalicious can’t go out in the public in those.), and a few pairs of capri pants clearly intended for the old library lady in orthopaedic sandals carrying that “book worm” tote bag. Don’t even ask me why I had those capri pants.

That’s it.

Why, oh why, can’t I throw stuff out like some of you people?! Y’all are good at just *shoop* tossing stuff out, *whoosh* chunking stuff in the trash, *psshht* dropping stuff off at Goodwill.

I have one lousy garbage bag to take…but a house full of crap that needs to go with it!

Teach me your ways. You clearly do not feel guilt. You have no perception of waste. You do not toy with visions of resale. You do not mind that the item was/is expensive. You have no desire to hold onto the thing in case its needed in the future. You are not hung up on sentimentality. You are a machine, and I am but a lowly, fool-hearty human with big boobs and old lady pants.

I know. I know. You don’t have to really tell me. I’ll do it. I’ll recognize that the money has already been spent, I’ll realize some stuff could help someone in need, and I’ll know to take a picture of the thing or remember the memories with it. I KNOW how to do it. Truly. I just need a kick in the pants.

I want to downsize and live smaller. I’m putting this on my agenda, and I’ll keep you posted so I stay accountable. In the meantime, I’ll be headed to the Goodwill later this afternoon with my one garbage bag of khaki shorts, tank tops, and capri pants, and I can drop them straight by your house if you want them and cut out the middle man.


You know…with all the stuff I have to unload, I could have a yard sale and make $1.3 million.

Amanda, shut up.

Published by Amanda Herring, Writer

Practical wisdom, joys and pains, motivation and tough love, from the perspective of a Mississippi mom, traveler, business owner, goal crusher, substance seeker, and full-time dreamer

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